Day 18 (Summary)

I haven't done these for a couple of days, but nobody has complained.  Therefore this may be the end of this experiment.  People have to actually be wanting to read this and  be willing to commit to it for me to continue. Genesis 36:1-37:36
All of Esau's descendants are listed... well all the main ones.  then we're on to Joseph! :D

Joseph is 17 and gets some dreams about how his brothers, father and mother will all bow down to him.  Israel keeps thinking about it but his brothers get well jealous.  One time he goes to check up on his brothers as his father asks him to but they grab him and sell him to some Ishmaelites (who are descended from Ishmael, the brother of Abraham, the great grandfather of Joseph.)  Reuben stops the brothers from killing Joseph and he also plans to rescue Joseph but the other brothers sell Joseph while Reuben is away looking after the sheep.  Judah is the one who thinks up the idea to sell Joseph.

Joseph says: "I'm going to be grieving for the rest of my life and no one can comfort me" when he fins out that Joseph has "died".  The brothers show their father the ripped cloak that he had given Joseph and say "is this Joseph's, we're not sure if it is or not - but you'll know" and Israel presumes that some wild animal has eaten Joseph.


Matthew 13:18-35
Jesus explains the parable of the sower.  then he gives a couple of parables about what heaven is like.  they're pretty amazing things.


Psalm 10:12-18
God get up!
Don't forget those who are helpless!
Why does the evil man hate God?
How could the evil man ever think that God won't judge him?
But God you definitely see my troubles and my sadness
Sort out all the evil of this world GOD!

You are King forever
Listen to what the people who are hurting want!
You encourage them!  You listen to their cries and pleas!
you defend the kids who have no parents
so that the bullies will not bully any more.

Day 17 (Summary)

Genesis 34:1-35:29
The daughter of Jacob (Dinah) gets raped by a guy called Prince Shechem.

Not good.

Jacob tells his sons when they get home from work and their tempers blow...

But Prince Shechem comes to them (oh dear, they're probably angry enough to kill him) and what he asks is OUTRAGEOUS!  He asks to marry Dinah - the girl he's just raped!  The sons hide their anger and say sweetly: Of course you can!!! ... IF you circumcise yourself and all the men of your town.

Prince Shechem does this (OUCH) but then Simeon and Levi go to the town and kill everyone there (except their sister.)  They strip the town of all its valuable stuff and go back to their father with Dinah.  Jacob's not happy because he thinks that it will make other people in the area dislike him and gang up and attack him.

Then God comes and tells Jacob to go back to the altar that Jacob had built when he'd run away from Esau.  So Jacob does so and God appears again and says: You've already had one of my angels tell you, but I want to tell you again as you are still being called Jacob.  That is NOT your name anymore.  Your name is Israel.  I want everyone to call you Israel.  And God also says all the promises that he usually gives about many descendants and lots of land.

Rachel gets pregnant again, but she had trouble giving birth.  The baby came out and Rachel was told that it was another boy.   She was dying and knew it so she named her son "son of sorrow" (Ben-Oni) but Israel (who was once called Jacob) comes in and says, "Nope.  Not his name.  His name will be Benjamin."

Rachel dies.  Rachel is buried.  Israel keeps moving his tents around.  At one point Reuben (the eldest son) goes and sleeps with Bilhah, one of his father's wives.  The equivalent of his step mum!! :S :S :S

Eventually Israel comes back home to where his father lives.  Isaac lives until he is 180 and then dies.  Esau and Israel bury him.


Matthew 12:46-13:17
Jesus' family come to see him and someone tells him.  Jesus shocks them all and says: "Who are they really?  I'll tell you shall I?  I'm surrounded by my brothers and sisters because anyone who does what God wants is my brother or my sister.

Woah.  Harsh stuff for the people who were his actual brothers and sisters!  On the same day Jesus tells the parable of the guy who sows some seeds and depending on where it lay depends on how much it grew.  It all seems like nonsense to the disciples because they ask him: "Why on earth do you teach people with stories that we can't understand?"

Jesus basically says: "It's part of a prophecy that says people will hear but never understand.  Then it says that they'll see but will never perceive.  If people listened more and looked out for each other more and understood everything in their hearts then they would come and believe me and i would heal them.".


Psalm 10:1-11
God you stand way off
Bad guys shoot the weak, who are hurt and maimed by the evil man's plots
The bad man is greedy and thinks it is good to be greedy and he hate god and s pits at him.
the evil man is proud
his thoughts have no time for God
He seems to get rich and have ltos of money all the time!
He sneers at people who hate him and says
"you're not going to make me poor or get my position.  I'm unshakable!"
He also says "I'm always going to be happy and never have any troubles."
He curses and lies and gives threats
He kills people
He htinks that God does not ssee all the bad things he does.

Day 16

Genesis 32:1-33:20

After Laban goes Jacob starts moving again.

From nowhere two angels appear and Jacob sees them.  He shouts out “This is where God lives!”

Later on Jacob gathers some servants together because he remembers what he had done to Esau and how Esau wants to kill him.  He says to them: “Go to Esau and say – I am your servant.  I have been living with Laban, our uncle.  I have sheep, goats, cattle, donkeys and servants.  I send this message because I want to be friends and brothers again.”

The servants go and come back.  They say, “Esau has got four hundred men together and he is coming out to meet you.”

Jacob is like: “Argh no!! He’s still angry with me and he’s going to kill me!” and he gets extremely afraid.  So he splits all his flocks and family into two groups so that should Esau catch one and attack it the second half would be able to run and get away.

Then Jacob prays to God and says, “God you are the God of my grandfather Abraham and the God of my father Isaac.  You told me to come back here so I did.   You also told me that if I came back you would make me extremely rich.  You’ve been so kind to me I really don’t deserve it.  When I left this place I had only a staff now I come back with a family and lots of money.  But please save me from Esau because he wants to kill me.  He’ll kill my wives and my children as well!  Yet you have told me that you would make my descendants like the grains of sand on a beach, because there will be so many that no one will be able to count them!  How can this be true if you let Esau come and kill us all now?”

Jacob spends the night in the area and in the morning sends lots of gifts to Esau.  He sends his servants with many animals (which were basically their equivalent of money) and tells them to run on ahead and meet Esau and give him the gifts before Esau and the four hundred men who are with him see Jacob and his family.  He explained to his servants that when Esau met them they were to be extremely polite and to tell him that the animals were a gift from Jacob.  Jacob thinks that if he can give Esau gifts Esau will be less angry and won’t kill him.  So the gifts go on ahead of Jacob but the rest of the people with Jacob camp the night in that place.

In the night Jacob wakes everyone up and moves them across a river that is nearby so that they don’t have to do it in the morning.  He sends everyone over but doesn’t cross the river himself.  He is on his own.  He is probably extremely anxious about what the morning is going to bring. 

A man comes up to him and they start to fight.  And they wrestle and fight until morning comes.  Then the man sees that he cannot overpower Jacob and so he reaches out and touches lightly the socket of Jacob’s hip.  Jacob’s hip is hurt badly.  Then the man says, “It is day now, so let me go. I don’t want to wrestle any more.”  But Jacob, knowing that he really needs a blessing and also that, because his hip is hurt, if he lets the man go now the man might turn on him when he is free and hurt him more, says, “I’m not letting you go until you bless me, then I know that you do not mean me any more harm.”

The man says, “What is your name?”  And Jacob presumes that this is because he wants his name to bless him.

“Jacob,” says Jacob.

Surprise!  “Well you won’t be called Jacob any more,” says the man.  “you will be called Israel, because you have had a struggle with god and with men.  You’ve really struggled but you have overcome.”

Jacob must be like, “Wow, who is this guy that he knows that?”  so he says, “What is YOUR name?”

“Why do you ask my name?” says the man, meaning: “You know who I am!”  And the man blesses him as Jacob had asked, and leaves.

But Jacob is wowed.  He says, “Woah!  I’ve just seen God face to face.  I mean – I’ve seen GOD!!!  I’ve seen him!  Wow!  I should be dead…  I should be dead!  But he kept me alive!  I’m actually alive though I’ve just fought with God!”  It is morning and the sun is rising as Jacob makes his way across the river to the rest of his family.  Where the man had touched his hip he was limping, a reminder always that he was now Israel and that he’d wrestled with God.

That day there comes a time where Jacob looks up and sees Esau and the four hundred men who are with him.  So he makes sure that his kids are with their mums and he puts the maidservants (who he’d slept with and had kids with) at the front.  Then he put Leah and her kids next.  And at the back, because he loved her most, he put Rachel and her baby Joseph.  Then he went in front of them all and bowed low to Esau.

Esau ignores all of this and runs up to Jacob – and hugs him!

Then he kisses his forehead as a greeting and they hug again and they begin to cry into each other’s shoulders because they are together again.

After a while Esau notices the owmen and children and asks, “who are all these?”  Jacob replies, “They’re all my kids – yep, all of them.  God has been extremely good to me to give me so many kids.”  And all the mums and their kids come and bow to Esau.

Esau turns back to Jacob and asks, ”Why did you send me all those animals?”

“So that you would welcome me back,” says Jacob.

2But I have LOADS!” says Esau.  “Keep them, keep them!”

“NO!” says Jacob.  “Please.  If you are going to welcome me then accept this gift I give to you.  Because to see your face again is like seeing God himself, it is so amazing!  Especially now I know you are going to welcome me back.  I have more then enough, please, I insist – you have them.”  So Esau accepts.

Then Esau says, “Right, lets get back to my camp quickly.  I’ll come with you!”

“Not a good idea,” says Jacob.  “The kids and women I have with me cannot travel as fast as you can and it takes time to move all these animals.  So you go ahead and I’ll come to your house at the speed that the kids walk at.”

“At least let me leave some guys with you to protect you,” says Esau.

“But why bother?” asks Jacob.  “Just be kind to me and like me and that will be enough.”

So Esau goes back to his camp and Jacob follows.  But before he goes to Esau he sets up his own camp and made places to keep all his sheep and other animals. 

And that’s how Jacob travelled safely from the house of Laban to where he built his own house.  He paid the owners of the land good money for it and bought it fairly.  Then he built and altar to God there.

Matthew 12:22-45

They brought Jesus a man who had a demon in him.  The man could not speak or see.  But Jesus healed the man and the man could speak and see!  And the crowds who were watching began to mutter: “Could this actually be the messiah, the one that we’ve been waiting for al these years.”

But Jesus had already angered the law-priests and so when they begin to hear people saying, “this could well be the King that we’re all to follow,” they start saying to the people.  “We know that you’re simple men and not very clever.  And you know that we are very clever men and that God speaks to us.  And we say that this isn’t the messiah who is going to save us, but this man Jesus gets the power to cast out demons from Satan!”

Jesus knows that they are telling the people this, however, and he says, “If a country has a civil war so that it fights itself then it is split in two and it crumbles into chaos.  Every will be chaotic if it fights itself.  So why would Satan drive out demons?  That would mean he is fighting against himself and he would soon no longer exist, and all his kingdom of evil would be in such chaos that there would be no demons in people.  but there are still demons in people so it is clear that he is not fighting himself.   Therefore I am using God’s power to drive out these demons and I am the messiah.”

“Look at it another way if you want.  If you go into the house with a burglar alarm you cannot rob it.  You have to disarm or break the burglar alarm before you can rob anything from the house.”

“If you do not believe me and help me and work for me then you are my enemy and against me.  If you do not bring people together as I do then you will be scattering them.  You can say all the bad things you want about me and you will still be forgiven, but if you speak bad things about God’s spirit then you will NEVER be forgiven.”

“If a tree is a good tree it will have good fruit.  If the tree is a bad tree it will have bad fruit.  You know how good a tree is by how good its fruit is.  So if you are an evil man how can you say anything good.  It’s like you’re a bad tree.  You know why this is?  Because what we say is actually a bit like a mirror on what our heart is like.  If our heart is full of evil then what we say will be evil, but if your heart is good then what you say will be good.  I warn you now though that when God comes to judge the world everyone will have to tell God their reasons for every single carless word that they have spoken in their lives.  You will be your words that send you to hell (because they reflect your heart).

The some law-priests came and said, “Jesus, give us a sign to show us if you really are the messiah and saviour we’ve been waiting for.  Jesus said, “Only evil people ask for a miracle as a sign for something.  You’re getting no such sign other than what you’ve already seen, except for the sign of Jonah.  Just as Jonah was in the fish for three days so I will be in the earth for three days.  But the people that Jonah preached to will be sending you to hell because they turned to God when Jonah preached to them but you don’t turn to God even when there is someone who is greater than Jonah here: me.”

Then Jesus said, “If you kick an evil spirit out of someone.  It will travel around a bit and then go back to the original person and finds that it is completely empty and clean.  So it brings seven friends and they move right back in and the person is in a worse state than before the demon was kicked out.  That is what it will belike with this generation.

Proverbs 2:1-11

Listen to what these proverbs say.

Remember them in your mind

Tune your ears in to only hear wisdom

And make sure your heart works really hard at understanding what the proverbs mean

If you call out and ask to see the meaning of something

And cry out to ask for understanding

And if you look for it like you look for a stash of twenty pound notes

And if you search for it like you would search if you knew that somewhere in your garden was a massive pile of buried treasure

Then you will understand how to respect God

And find out more about God.

God gives wisdom

Out of his mouth come knowledge and understanding

If you try your best God will make sure you win

If you are blameless then God will be like a shield around you

If you are just and do what is right then God will guard you

If you keep believing in him he will protect your life.

Then you will really know what is the right way to live

You will know how to be fair and always do the right thing.

Because wisdom will come into your heart

And you will love knowledge

You will be discrete and that will protect you (from people accusing you)

When you understand that will guard you (from Satan)

Day 15

Genesis 31:1-55

Jacob is getting wealthier and wealthier thanks to God, but this means that Laban’s wealth is slowly becoming less.  One day Jacob hears some of Laban’s sons talking and they say, “Jacob is taking everything that our father owns and all this wealth that Jacob has is from our father!  We should be getting what our father owns – not Jacob.  If this goes on like this our father will have nothing to give us when he dies!”  At the same time Jacob began to realise that Laban wasn’t being as friendly as he had first been when they had met.

So it was good timing when god comes to Jacob and says, “Jacob: time to go!  I want you to go back to your father.  I will be with you.”

Immediately Jacob sends messages to Rachel and leah and tells them to come and meet him out in the fields where no one will hear them talking and no one will think that they are planning anything.  He explains the situation and says, “I’m leaving.  Your father doesn’t like me much at the moment even though it has been HIM who has cheated ME.  He has tried to not have to pay me as much by changing what I am paid, but god has not allowed that to harm me.  If your dad was going to pay me in speckled goats then all the goats would have speckled young.  And your dad was going to pay me in the stripy goats then the goats would give birth to stripy babies.  So God has taken away your father’s flocks of sheep and goats and has given them to me.

Then Jacob told them of a dream he’d had: “I dreamt that an angel came to me and he said ‘Jacob’ and I answered him by saying ‘I’m here’.  Then he told me that God could see what Laban was doing and that this was the same God who had given me the dream before (the one I had when I was travelling here twenty years ago, I set up a stone and made a vow that should God return me to my land safely then he would become my God.) then the angel told me that it is God’s command for me to return home.  So that is what I plan to do.”

Rachel and Leah both AGREE for once.  They say “what is there for us here?  We don’t get any inheritance from our dad because we’re girls.  He treats us like we’re from a different country.  He has sold us and what he got for us he has wasted.  The amount God has given you is what is owed to us by our father.  So God has made our father pay the debt he owes us for his bad treatment of us.  So this doesn’t matter to us what you do: do whatever God has told you.”

So Jacob packs up really quickly and he takes all his livestock (cattle and other animals) and all the other goods he had got whilst he’d been living with Laban and he headed off back towards his father Isaac.  Isaac was still living in Canaan. 

Laban is out of the house when they were packing – he is off shearing sheep.  So without anyone knowing Rachel creeps into her father’s room and steals the little idols that Laban has which he thinks were the gods that protected his house from bad things.  Besides that Jacob is tricking Laban by running away without telling him.  Then they run and leave quickly.

Three days later (because the sheep he was shearing were being kept a few days journey away from the house) Laban eventually hears that Jacob is gone.  So he gathers his family together and he chases after Jacob.  And even though Jacob has a three-day head start Laban catches up with him four days later, on the seventh day.  But the night before he catches up with Jacob Laban gets a dream from God and God says to him, “Be very careful what you say to Jacob… do not try and persuade him to stay by good things (offering more money) or bad things (threatening).

When they meet up to talk Laban says: “Why?  You tricked me and you’ve brought MY daughters with you, carrying them off like they were captive women you captured in war that you could just go and rape at any time you wanted.  Why did you run off secretly?  If you’d told me I could have sent you off with a feast and a celebration!  You didn’t EVEN let mesay goodbye to my daughters or my grandchildren.  That was foolish of you, because I have the power to harm you!  But last night the God of your father Isaac came to me and told you not to do anything to you.  So this is what I say: I can understand that you have left to return to your father again.  But why did you steal the gods that protect my house?  That is like swearing at me in the face.

Jacob doesn’t know that Rachel has stolen the God’s so he says, “I was afraid you would not let me take your daughters with me.  But if you find ANYONE who has your gods then I shall kill that person.  I have not taken them.  It must have been someone else, but feel free to look around our camp yourself to make sure.  In fact if I have ANYTHING of yours here you can take it!

So Laban goes and checks the tents.  He finds nothing.  Then he comes to Rachel’s tent.  Thankfully she has put them in the saddle of her camel so he finds nothing in her tents.  She takes the precaution of sitting on her camel and excusing herself from standing up in her father’s presence by saying: “I’m having my period so I can’t stand up.”  So Laban finds nothing.

When it is proved that they don’t have the idols, Jacob becomes angry.  He says: “So what exactly is my crime?  What sin have I committed that you hunt me down?  You have looked through all of MY things.  If you have found ANYTHING that is yours then bring it out in front of everyone and everyone can judge whether it belongs rightfully to me or you!  You know what? I’ve been with you twenty years now.  Your sheeps and goats have not miscarried.  I haven’t eaten any of your rams when I was feeling hungry as I watched the flocks (many shepherds could do this I guess).  If an animal was attacked by wild animals then I didn’t say ‘oops well that’s your loss’, I made sure I paid you back for every time it happened so that it was my loss!”

Then he launched into the hard things about his job: “I was boiling hot in the day and freezing cold at night!  I was constantly so tired that I could barely keep my eyes open.  And you made me pay if anyone stole even the smallest sheep or goat! I worked fourteen years to get your daughters and six years for your goats and sheeps and you changed your wages TEN times!  If my God hadn’t been with me and if you weren’t afraid of my father’s anger then you would have sent me away with nothing.  But God HAS seen what you’ve done to me and last night he told you off for doing so!”

Laban says in response: “The women here are my daughters! The children are MY children.  The flocks are MY flocks.  All you see is MINE!  But still, what can I do about my daughters or their children? Nothing.  So lets make an contract which will keep us in peace with one another.”

So they gather stones and put them in a heap to mark a boundary.  Then they agree that neither fot hem shall cross that boundary.  And Laban says “God will watch us both.  If you ill-treat my daughters though, or if you marry another women even if I’m not there to make sure they’re treated well, God is watching you and he’ll punish you.”  Then they made their contract and parted ways in the morning, with Laban kissing goodbye to his daughters and grandchildren.  Then he and his family returned home.

Matthew 12:1-21

It was a Sabbath, which was basically Saturday.  No that day no one could do ANY work.  None at all.   It was so strict that you couldn’t even SPIT ON DIRT! Incase gravity pulled it down and it mixed with the dirt and made mud – that was considered work…  Yea, something had gone wrong somewhere with the law, but Jesus is out to set it right.

So anyway, it was a Sabbath and Jesus walked through a field of corn.  He allows his disciples to pick some of the corn and eat it.  Well this is also considered work and some of the law-priests come and say: “Look! Your disciples are working on the Sabbath by picking that corn.  You’re in charge of them, what are you going to do about it?”

Jesus looked at them and he said: “Let me ask you this – have you ever read the part in the old testament where David goes into the temple and he takes some of the bread that it was lawful for ONLY the priests to eat.  And you know what he does?  He EATS it.. even though it was unlawful.  Or that part where it points out that the priests work on the Sabbath by working in the temple and sacrificing to God, but they remain innocent for doing so.  I say this: speaking to you is one person who is GREATER than the temple (the DWELLING PLACE of our GOD!  The most important place to ALL Jews – I’m more important than it!)  It also says in the old testament that God desires “mercy over sacrifices”.” 

That’s pretty big to the Jews as their entire religious rules are based on sacrificing things to God.  Jesus is telling them that there is something that God likes more than the sacrifices which they give!  Woah!  But Jesus isn’t finished…

“If you knew what those words meant,”

(by the way he’s talking to the guys who studied the law and the old testament as their JOB.  They KNEW the old testament better than anyone, except Jesus obviously, but Jesus is saying ‘if you knew what it meant’!! He’s accusing them of not having understood the old testament when it was their JOB to understand the old testament.  It’s like God going into your science lesson and saying to the teacher: if you only knew how much more there is to science than what you know.  The teacher would be like: I’ve studied at university – I know everything there is to know.  And God would be like: sorry, but you’ve overlooked some stuff, there is stuff you don’t know.  I’m better than you)

So Jesus said “If you knew what those words meant you would not condemn the innocent and tell them that they’re going to hell.  I am the Lord of the Sabbath.”  He moved away from the field and goes into their church to preach.  As he got to this church (which they called a synagogue) he saw a man with an arm which was completely shrivelled up.  He looked at the law-priests who had come with him and he said: “Is it against the law to heal a man on the Sabbath?”  They don’t seem to answer partly because they all know that it IS against the law so Jesus then said, “if your sheep falls in a ditch on a Sabbath you would get it out of the ditch because it is too valuable to leave it there.  It would NOT be against the law to do that.  And a man is MUCH more valuable than a sheep.  Therefore I say to you that it is lawful to do good on the Sabbath.”  Then Jesus said to the man “Stretch out your hand”  So the man stretched out his hand, and it was completely healed!

Then the law-priests started plotting on how to kill Jesus because he was such a nuisance.

Jesus knew this and so he went away from that town.  Loads of people followed him and he healed all of the sick people, though he warned them not to start telling people who he was.  This was to complete a prophecy that one of the old testament prophets had made:

“I’ve given my servant to you.  I have chosen him

I love him and I enjoy watching him.

I will put the holy spirit in him

He will tell everyone that justice is on its way

He won’t argue or cry out

No one will hear him in the streets

He will not break an already bruised reed

He will not put out the wick of a candle that is only smouldering

Not until he brings justice to EVERYONE

In his name nations will put their hope.”

Psalm 9:13-20

God look at how the bullies bully me!

Have mercy and take me away from the gates of the hospital where they might put me.

So then I can sing to you

In your city in heaven

I will rejoice in the way you save us

The nations dug a pit to trap others but they trap themselves

They hid a net to catch something and they catch their own feet

People know God because they hear about how just he is

The wicked are mad einto slaves by what they do

Evil people go back to the grave

As will all the nations and countries that forget God

But those who are in need will not remain forgotten

Those who are beaten up will not lose hope

Get up God!  Don’t let mankind win!

Get the nations into your presence and judge them!

Make them afraid of you

Remind everyone that only you are God and that they are only men!

Day 14

Genesis 29:1-30:43

Jacob continues on his journey into the east until he reaches the equivalent of a service station: a well!  “Well, well, what have we here,” he thinks, because there are some other men gathering around the well already and they have their flocks of sheep with them.  Turns out that when all the different flocks are together then the stone cover is rolled off the well and they draw up water and give the sheep a drink.  The only reason the stone is there is to stop all the water from drying out in the heat of the sun.

“Where are you from?” Jacob asks.

“Haran,” they reply.  “Ah” Jacob thinks, “that’s where I’m going” so he goes ahead and asks “Do you know of a guy called Laban?  He’s the grandson of Nahor.

“We know him,” they say.

“Is he well?” Jacob asks, for Laban is his uncle, even if he has never seen him before.

“He sure is,” they say, “And look, here comes his daughter now – Rachel.”  But Jacob only glances in the direction to see yet MORE sheep coming.  There are already quite a lot there so he says “Look, guys, why do you water all these sheep now? The sun is high and it is extremely hot.  Don’t gather all the flocks together, give your sheep some water then go back to the fields where they can graze and sleep in the afternoon sun.”

But the men say, “We can’t.  We need everyone to roll the stone cover off the well so everyone needs to be here before we water the sheep because one person can’t do it on their own.”

Then there was probably that big awkward silence… lol well Jacob looks around at the sheep that Laban’s daughter Rachel was bringing to the well (she was a shepherdess) but this time he actually spots Rachel.  So he goes over and waters her sheep for her (after they’ve got the cover of) and then he behaves a little stupidly (or we would think so anyway).  He kisses Rachel (presumably NOT on the lips… but as a greeting) and he starts to cry.  And as he cries he says that he is a relative of her father.  Rachel runs to her father and tells him.  As soon as Laban hears he hurries out and runs to meet Jacob. 

Then Laban hugged him and kissed him (again, presumably NOT on the lips) and he takes him into his house and says “You’re like a son to me.”

That was the beginning of a good relationship.  Jacob stays with Laban and works for him.  After a month Laban comes and says “you’re a relative but I should pay you if you work for me.  So what do you want me to pay you?”

It should be noted at this point that Laban has TWO daughters.  The older one is called Leah, and Rachel is the younger one.  Leah has “weak” eyes, but Rachel is stunningly beautiful. 

Jacob is in love with Rachel and so he says, “I will work for you for seven years IF you give me your daughter Rachel to be my wife.”

And Laban says “Well, why not?  Better that she’s married to you than any other man!  Stay here and work for me and I will let you marry Rachel.”  So a couple of days passed… well it seemed like a couple of days for Jacob, because he was in love with Rachel, but it was actually SEVEN YEARS!!  Then Jacob goes to Laban and says: I have worked seven years for you, now you must give me Rachel to be my wife.  I want to sleep with her.”

Laban agrees and puts on a massive feast and celebration.  Now it was custom that the wife would wear a viel through the feast and also until the morning.  So no one noticed that Laban had actually put LEAH into the bride’s dress instead of Rachel.  As a gift Laban gives a slave girl called Zilpah to be a maidservant for his daughter.  So Jacob goes off and sleeps with her.  But in the morning he wakes up and its time to take the veil off… then he finds out that actually he’s just slept with Rachel’s older sister!  Oh dear.  He’s not happy.

“You’ve tricked me!  What have I done that you decide to do this to me?” Jacob demands the next morning.  And Laban says smoothly, “I’m sorry Jacob, but its custom here that the older sister MUST be married before the younger sister is.  Have the week’s holiday that you have to have with Leah, but at the end of the week you can be married to Rachel, but you will have to then stay here for another seven years and work for me again.”

Jacob loves Rachel so he does this.  Laban gives a servant called Bilhah to be Rachel’s maidservant.  So Jacob eventually gets to lie with Rachel, but he loves Rachel more than Leah.  And then he starts working for another seven years.  He must have been furious that he’d been tricked, but he must have loved Rachel more because he works a total of FOURTEEN YEARS trying to get her!

But God sees everything and he saw that Leah was not loved by Jacob so he made it that Leah COULD have babies but that RACHEL couldn’t. :O  So Leah gives birth to a son, who was Jacob’s firstborn, and she calls him Reuben and she thinks “Surely Jacob will love me more now!”  Then she gives birth to a second son and calls him Simeon and she thinks “At least God sees that I am unloved because he has given me TWO sons!”  Then she gives Jacob a THIRD son and she thinks “Surely now after THREE sons, Jacob will love me.”  And she calls the third son Levi.  Then she gives birth to a fourth son and she thinks, “I don’t think anything could ever make Jacob ove me more, so I will just praise God.”  At that time she stops having children.

Rachel sees that her sister is having loads of boys and becomes really jealous.  So she says to Jacob: “Give me kids!! If you don’t I will die!”  Obviously Jacob has no power to just say “have kids” and make her have kids so he gets angry that she’s expecting something from him that he can’t give and replies “Am I god?  Only god can keep you from having kids or allow you to have them!”

So Rachel says, “Right here is the maidservant my father gave me.  Have sex with her and her child can be counted as mine!”

So her maidservant, Bilhah, sleeps with Jacob and becomes pregnant.  And Rachel says “God has heard me ask for kids.  I am proven godly.”  And she calls the kid Dan.  Then Bilhah has a second child and Rachel says “Ha! Stuff that in your face Leah!  I have won this fight, my sister!”  And she calls him Naphtali.

This doesn’t go down too well with Leah, especially as she can’t seem to have anymore kids at the moment.  So Leah takes HER maidservant and says to Jacob: “Bed, now!”  Leah’s maidservant, Zilpah, bears a son and Leah says, “I have got lucky!” and she names him Gad.  Then Zilpah gives birth to a second son and Leah says “Ha ha! I am insanely happy!  All the women from all around will call me happy :D”  She calls this little boy Asher.

In the Autumn Reuben, the eldest son of Jacob and Leah, went out into the fields and found some mandrakes (which were supposed to make women more fertile) and brings them back to his mum, Leah.  Rachel hears about this and, knowing that she needs everything she can to make herself more fertile so as to have a child, goes to Leah and says, “Please give me the mandrakes I know you have.  Even just some of them will be good enough.”  But Leah says, “You stole my husband from me!  Will you take my mandrakes too?”

Now remember that that statement is quite funny because really it was Leah that had stolen Rachel’s husband because Jacob had always wanted Rachel and not Leah.  But Rachel ignores this and she says… “very well, I will let you sleep with him tonight if you give me some of the mandrakes.”  Leah agrees with this and hands over the mandrakes.  Then she waits for Jacob to return home from work.  When he gets in she says “Tonight you are sleeping with me.  I have hired you with the mandrakes that Reuben picked.”  So he slept with her… and she got pregnant because God cared for her and blessed her with a fifth son (the more sons you gave birth to the better women you were as the sons were the most important in those days). 

Leah says at the birth of her FIFTH son: “this must be a reward from God because I gave Jacob my maidservant to sleep with.”  And she calls the baby boy Issachar.  And again Leah gets pregnant and she has a SIXTH son!  And she says “This is such an amazing gift God has given me, for surely Jacob must treat me with honour because I have given him SIX sons!”  And she calls the baby Zebulun.  Some time later she has a daughter and names her Dinah.

But God remembers (which means care for/looked after) Rachel and he finally opens her womb.  She becomes pregnant and FINALLY has a son.  She says “God has taken away the disgrace of having no children.”  And she calls the baby JOSEPH.  At the same time she asks, “God please will you give me another son!”

After Rachel gives birth to Joseph, Jacob goes to Laban and says, “Allow me to go back to my homeland where my father is.  Allow me to take my wives and my kids.  I have served you so that I may look after them.  Now let me go.  You know I’ve done loads of work for you!  You have no reason to keep me.”

But Laban says “If you have ever loved me and cared for me then please stay.  God has told me that he has only blessed ME because of YOU.  I tell you what: you name what you want me to pay you and I’ll pay you to stay and work for me!”

So Jacob says to himself “time to get even, you tricked me into all this trouble with my wives.”  So he says out loud to Laban, “I have worked hard for you, you know this.  The flocks have grown massive because I cared for them.  God has blessed whichever land I am in.  Now I want to do something for my own family and not for your family.”

So Laban says, “What shall I give you that shall help you do this?”  And Jacob says, “Give me nothing, BUT if you do ONE thing for me I shall continue to work for you and look after your flocks.  Go through your flocks and take all the spotted, speckled, dark, streaked or marked goats.  Take them out.  They shall be my wages.  And then if you ever find that I have an unmarked goat in my flock then you shall know that I have cheated you.”

Sounds good to Laban and he agrees.  Then he goes through and takes all the marked goats out of his flocks and makes his sons look after them then he moves three days away from Jacob.  Uh oh.  How is Jacob supposed to get more wages if there are no marked goats in HIS flock… that’s not how mating works.  Sneaky trick of Laban… but Jacob gets him back.  He takes some branches of a tree and strips some of the bark off so that it is stripy.  Then, when the goats come to drink and mate he puts those branches in the watering bowls.  Then (it must be a miracle0 whenever they mated in front of those branches the offspring they gave were marked, even though the parents WEREN’T marked. :O :O wow.  Then Jacob gets clever.  He only puts the branches in front of the goats when the strong and healthy ones are mating.  When the weak and rubbish ones are mating he doesn’t put the branches up and the offspring are not marked.  So in the end Jacob ends up with loads of strong, beautiful goats and Laban ends up with a load of thin, rubbishy ones.  By doing this Jacob grew to be extremely rich and had large flocks and lots of servants and camels and donkeys.  He’d made it big time! :D  

Matthew 11:16-30

“The people of this generation are like children who say to others in public places: ‘We played you dancing music and you didn’t dance; but then we sang you a funeral song and you did not mourn.’  And it’s a bit like that because John the Baptist came and he did not eat of drink, but he fasted.  And you said ‘he has a demon in him.’  Then I come and I eat and I drink and you call me, ‘glutton,’ and ‘drunkard’ ‘a friend of tax collectors and sinners’.  But true wisdom is shown by how you act not who you hang around with.”

Then Jesus began to say why the towns were rubbish and he cursed them (funny how the towns he curses are no longer around.)  He said “Curse you Korazin! Curse you Bethsaida!  If the miracles that you have seen had been down in Tyre and Sidon (some amazingly rich and wealthy towns of the non-jews) then they would have repented long ago and be mourning and saying sorry now.  It will be better for those sinners on the day of judgement than for you towns!  And curse you Caprnaum!  Will you go to heaven? Nope.  You’re going to hell!  If the miracles that have taken place in you had been done in Sodom and Gomorrah (two towns from Genesis that were completely evil and were completely destroyed) then they would have been standing to this day and they wouldn’t have been destroyed.  It will be better for the people of Sodom on the day of judgement.”

But after this Jesus said “Dad in heaven, I praise you!  I praise you because you have hidden these amazing truths from those who are wise and clever and you’ve shown great secrets to those who are young.  Because that is what you wanted to do.  My dad has given me everything.  No one knows me except for God and no one knows God except me and those whom I tell.”

And he went on, “Anyone who is tired of this world, who are carrying heavy burdens of guilt and sin and pain.  I will give you rest!  I am gentle and I am humble and your soul will find true rest in me.  My rules are not heavy and burdensome like the yokes/rules of the other teachers.  My yoke/rules are easy and the burden is light (cos they’re summed up by love god and love each other AND you’re gonna get a helper!)

Psalm 9:7-12

God rules as a king forever.

He has made himself a king so that he can judge

He will be the perfect judge for the world

He will govern everyone with justice

God is a refuge to the oppressed

He is like a castle in times of trouble

Those who know you God trust you

You have NEVER forsaken ANYONE who has looked for you, Gof

So sing praises to God who sits on his throne in heaven!

Shout out to everyone what he has done!

God remembers/cares for people

He does NOT ignore the cries of the people in pain.

Day 13

Genesis 27:1-28:22

Isaac gets older and his eyesight  starts going.  One day he calls Esau, his favourite son and Esau comes.  Then Isaac says “I’m old now and my death is approaching, although I don’t know when it will be.  So get your weapons – your bow and arrows – and go out into the wild places and catch something for me.  Then cook my favourite dish with it and bring it to me to eat; then I will give you my blessing so that I will not die without giving it to you.”

Rebekah is near the tent when Isaac is speaking though and her favourite son is Jacob so she doesn’t want to see Esau get the blessing.  So when Esau has gone hunting she runs to Jacob and tells him everything that’s gone on and what Isaac has asked Esau to do.  Then she explains her plan: “listen carefully my son, do exactly what I say.  Go out to our flocks and get me two of our best goats.  I will cook them just the way your father likes.  Then you can take it into your father and he will bless you instead.”

But Jacob sees a problem is like: “Woa, mum! Esau is hairier than a goat – I have smooth skin.  If dad figures out that I’m not Esau he’ll curse me and I’ll be cursed instead of blessed.  It’s not worth the risk.”

Rebekah says “Don’t worry about that.  If he curses you then let it come onto me instead, just do what I say!  Time is short.”

So Jacob does as his mum says and he gets the goats.  Rebekah cooks them exactly the way Isaac likes and then goes and gets some of Esau’s best clothes, which she has handily in the house.  She puts them on Jacob.  Then she takes the goatskin of the goats which were now chunks of cook meat and covers Jacob’s hands and neck to make them hairy.  Then she quickly gives him the meal she has cooked and points him towards his father’s room.

Jacob goes to his father and announces his arrival by saying “Dad.”  Isaac says, “Yes, my son?  Which one of you is it?”

“I am Esau, your firstborn,” says Jacob.  “And I have done as you asked.  Sit up and eat some of the meat I have caught for you so that you may bless me.”  Isaac was a little suspicious, because he says “How did you ever find it so quickly?”  To which Jacob has the right answer: “The Lord who is your God gave me success.”  Isaac accepts this but is still unsure and says, “Come closer.  I cannot see you but let me touch you so that I may know whether you are really Esau or not.”  Jacob must have been pretty scared as he came forward, but he does come forward and Isaac touches the hair of the goatskin and says, “Your voice is like Jacob’s but your hands are of Esau, so he gives him a blessing, a small one it seems.  Because he still has some doubts. 

These doubts are shown because he asks again “are you really my son Esau?” and Jacob says “Yes.”  So Isaac says, “Right then if you would just bring me some of the meat you have caught and cooked for me to eat and I will give you my full blessing.”

Jacob brings it  forward, probably thinking ‘come on, hold it together just a bit longer Jacob and we can get out of here with the blessing before Esau returns.’  So Isaac eats and drinks then says “Come near to me my son and kiss me on the forehead.”  So Jacob goes forward and respectfully kisses his father’s forhead.  But Isaac was cunning because he uses the last of the senses he has: smell.  He has heard the voice, he has touched the arm, he has tasted the food, he can’t see, so smell is the last test to see whether this is really his son Esau.  But Jacob was wearing esau’s clothes so Isaac smells Esau and so he gives him his full blessing, saying…

“You smell like a field that the Lord has blessed.  May God give you the dew that will keep the plants growing, and may he give you a rich earth so that your crops may grow lots.  May you get lots of grain and wine.  May other countries serve you, and the people in those countries bow down to you.  Be the lord over your brothers and may the sons of your mother bow down to you.  May anyone who curses you be cursed and may anyone who blesses you be blessed.”

Isaac finishes his blessing and Jacob gets out of his father’s room quickly.  It was a good thing too, because not long after Jacob had left Esau comes back from hunting.  He cooks his food and takes it to his father and he says, “Dad, sit up and eat this food I have caught for you and then you can give me your blessing.”  But Isaac is confused and asks, “Who are you?”  Then it is Esau’s time to be confused, because he says, “I am your son… Esau…”

Then Isaac begins to think “oh no, I’ve given his blessing to someone other than Esau, please God don’t let this be happening to me,” and he trembles.  He says “Who was it then that already brought me food?  I ate it JUST before you came and I blessed him.  And he will definitely be blessed, I cannot take it back now.”  Esau hears his father’s words and breaks down into tears.  And he says “Bless me too dad!  Please!!”  But Isaac realises now who it was who had come before and says “your brother cane and tricked me and he has your blessing.”  And Esau says “My brother has now tricked me TWO times!  He has taken my birthright and NOW he has taken my blessing!”  But before he left he asked his father, “Have you reserved any of your blessing for me?”

Isaac says, “I have made him lord over you and have made all his relatives his servants.  I have given him grain and wine.  What else could I possibly do for you?”  Esaus says, “Do you only have one blessing dad?  Bless me too dad, PLEASE!!”  But Isaac is quiet and Esau cries loudly.  But Isaac isn’t finished, he speaks again.  “You will live away from earth which is good for gorwing things, you will not get the dew from the sky which will help plants grow.  You will always be fighting and you will serve your brother Jacob.  BUT when you grow restless you will throw off his rule over you.”

Esau leaves but he holds a grudge against Jacob from then on.  He says to himself “Soon dad will die and then I’ll kill Jacob.”  Rebekah hears this, however, and she tells Jacob.  So she says to him “Do exactly what I say: Go at once to this place called Haran.  It is where I lived before I married your father.  I have a brother there.  Stay with him for a while until Esau’s anger has gone.  When he has calmed down I will send a message and tell you to come back.”

So Rebekah goes to Isaac and says, “It’s horrible living here with these foreign women.  They are Hittite women.  If Jacob gets a Hittite wife (basically a wife who is from this land) and not from our own homeland then I may as well be dead because my life will not be worth living.”

Isaac agrees with this (remember how they did not like how Esau had married two Hittite and they had caused Isaac and Rebekah grief?) and so he sends for Jacob.  He gives him a command: “Do NOT marry a women from this land, which is called Canaan.  Any women who is from Canaan is not good for you.  Go to your uncle and find a wife from amongst his daughters.  May God be good to you and make you have lots of stuff until your family is enough to become a community of its own.   May you be the one who continues under the blessing of Abraham after me, so that you may one day take this land (Canaan) as your own land.  God gave Abraham this land, one day it will be yours (for I am to old for it to be mine now).  So Isaac sends Jacob away to Laban (who was Rebekah’s brother)

Esau hears about this and he hears that Isaac has commanded Jacob not to marry a women from the land of Canaan, including the Hittite women.  And then Esau realises how annoyed Isaac is that he, Esau, has married two Hittite women and so Esau goes to Ishamel (Isaac’s brother) and he marries a women called Mahalath, one of Ishmael’s daughters.

But Jacob in the meanwhile leaves his father’s house and he travels toward the place where Laban lives.   He stops for the night at one place because it is dark.  It is a stony place so Isaac takes a stone and uses it as a pillow.  Then he goes to sleep.  As he sleeps he gets a dream and it is something llike this:

There is a stairway which is resting on the earth.  Its top stretches up to heave.  On the stairs there are angels going up and down it.  Above the stair God stands.  God looks at Jacob and says “I am the LORD!  I am the God who is the God of Abraham and Isaac.  I will give you and your children and your children’s children and you children’s children’s children and ALL of your descendents, the land that you are sleeping on.  Your descendants will be like dust there will be so many of them!  You will spread everywhere, to the west and the east and the south and the north.  Everyone will be blessed because of your descendents.  I want you to know that I’m with you and will look after you.  I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised.”

When Jacob eventually wakes up he thinks “Surely the LORD is in this place and I did not know!”  He was so afraid that he said “How AMAZING is this place!!!!  It has to be the house of God!  This has to be the gate of heaven!

When it was morning Jacob takes the stone he had used as a pillow and stands it upright to be a pillar and a marker.  Then he puts oil on it to make it godly and holy and he calls it Bethel (which means house of God)

Then Jacob says “If God is with me always and if he will watch over me on this journey to my uncle that I am on, and if God will give me food and drink and clothes and if god will return me at some time to my father’s house then this God will be MY God also.  And this pillar will be God’s house  and of everything that this God gives me I will give him a tenth!”

Matthew 10:32-11:15

Jesus continued instructing his disciples on how to use the power he had given them…

“If you tell other people about me then I will tell my father (God) about you.  But if you don’t tell people about me, then I will not tell my father (God) about you.  And please don’t think that I have come to bring peace ON EARTH!  I did not!  I came to bring wars!  For I have come to turn… (he quotes a passage of the old testament, Micah 6:7) …

“a man against his father,

A daughter against her mother,

A daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law

A man’s enemies will be members of his own household”

(the disciples were probably like: wow, never saw that bit of the bible like THAT before.  To think that that actually applies to Jesus!!)  But Jesus continued…

“If you love your dad or your mum or your daughter or your son MORE than me you are NOT worthy of me.  If you do not willingly suffer for me then you are NOT worthy of me.  Whoever finds his life will find that he’s actually lost it.  But if you lose your life because of me then you wil find that you have actually just FOUND your life!

If you believe in me then anyone who is kind to you, is kind to me.  And anyone who is kind to me is kind to the one who put me on this earth: my father (God).  It makes sense because if you are kind to a prophet then a prophet will give you what reward he can give you.  And if you are kind to a godly man then you will get the reward of a godly man.  Makes sense?  But if you give even a cup of cool refreshing water to a man because he is my disciple then that person will most definitely NOT lose his reward!”

And that was the end of his instruction to his disciples.  He went on from there and began to teach and preach things in the towns of this place called Galilee.

John the Baptist heard about this, but at the time he was in prison so he couldn’t go to see Jesus.  Instead John got some of his own disciples to go to Jesus and ask him a question.  (John was in prison he must have been pretty low so even he was beginning to wonder if Jesus actually WAS the messiah.  His disciples come to Jesus and they said “Are you definitely the Messiah, or is it going to be someone else?”

Jesus’ reply goes like this: “Tell John to make up his own mind, but tell him what’s going on: the blind are seeing, the lame are walking, those who have ungodly diseases are being cured, the deaf are hearing, the dead are being raised and THE good news is being preached to the poor.  Blessed is the man who does not fall away on account of me.”

So John’s disciples left with this answer and as they did Jesus began teaching about John the Baptist.  He said “Why did you go out into the desert where John was?  To see nothing?  If not then why did you go out there?  To see a rich man dressed in fine clothes?  No, those people live in palaces.  Then what did you go to see?  A prophet? Yes.  You know what? I say that you went out to see more than a prophet.  Because John is the one about whom the old testament says ‘I will send my messenger ahead of you, and he will prepare your way before you.’  You know what the truth is?  The truth is that there is no one who has ever been born who is greater than John the Baptist, yet even the person who is the least in the Kingdom of Heaven is greater than John!  From the days of John the Baptist until NOW the kingdom of Heaven has been pushing forward and coming into this world.  Men who are forceful and push forward and grab hold of it will become part of it.  All the prophets and the Law prophesied until John.  If you are willing to accept it this is Elijah!  For it is said that Elijah would come back to Earth to make a way for the Messiah.  John is that Elijah!  He who is wise, remember this.

Psalm 9:1-6

I will sing songs to you with ALL of my heart, God

I will tell people about all the amazing things you have done

I will be happy and will celebrate in you

I will sing songs to your name O God above everything else

My enemies cannot face you

They stumble and run away from you

For you have chosen my side

You have sat on your throne and you judge perfectly

You have warned nations – told them off and destroyed the wicked 

You have killed them and made it so that no one remembers them

The enemy is ALWAYS ruined

You have pulled up their cities like a weed

Even the memory of the cities are completely gone!

Day 12

Genesis 25:1-26:35

Sarah is dead so Abraham takes another wife.  Her name is Keturah.  (She is probably a young woman even though Abraham is now nearing 175 years.  Keturah, this new wife gives him some more sons: Zimran, Jokshan, Medan, Midian, Ishbak and Shuah.  (Pretty cool names lol)  Some of these had sons of there own mentioned.

They are called descendents of Keturah (this is quite strange as usually it would be said that they were descended from their father, but here Abraham’s descendent is Isaac, he is to be the only son to get any of Abraham’s inheritance.)

Abraham leaves everything he owns to Isaac, but while he is living in his last days he gives some gifts to the sons of his other wife and then sends them away (a bit like he did with Hagar and Ishmael) to keep them apart from Isaac.  They go into the east.

Abraham lives 175 years and then he dies.  Isaac and Ishmael bury him together in the same patch of land that Abraham had bought many years ago to bury Sarah.  He is buried next to Sarah.  It is after Abraham’s death that God comes and he blesses Isaac. 

Ishmael, the son of Hagar (who was Egyptian) and Abraham, had many sons.  Their names are these: Nebaioth, Kedar, Adbeel, Mibsam, Mishma, Dumah, Massa, Hadad, Tema, Jetur, Naphish and Kedemah.  Ishmael lived 137 years and then died.  His people (his family) move near to the border of Egypt and they were always violent and hostile.

When Isaac was forty he married Rebekah.  Isaac prays to God for his wife, because Rebekah can’t have kids.  After he prays Rebekah becomes pregnant.  As the babies grow inside her she feels them jostling each other and she says “Why is this happening to me?”  So she goes and asks God and God says to her “Inside you there are two different countries.  One will be stronger than the other and the one that is older will be a slave to the one who is the younger.”

The time comes for her to give birth and she does so, but it is a strange birth.  The first son comes out and he is red and hairy, so they call him Esau.  The second baby comes out, but his hand is grasping Esau’s heel and they name him Jacob.  Isaac is sixty years old at this point.

The boys grow up and they become very different.  Esau goes out hunting lots and is extremely good at hunting.  Jacob stays around the tents more and it quieter.  So Isaac comes to love Esau more and Rebekah comes to love Jacob more.

Then one day Esau comes in from hunting and goes to Jacob, who is cooking a stew.  He says to his brother: “Brother!  Give me some stew to eat because I am starving!”  (Jacob probably looked at Esau with a frown, he has grown up with Esau and knows that Esau is disrespectful of his family and ancestors.)  So Jacob says “I’ll give you some stew… IF you’ll sell me the birthright which means you get more than I do of our father’s land when he dies.  It will also mean that you give up the right to be the leader of our family after he dies and I will be the leader instead.”  Esau doesn’t think about it, he say, “I’m DYING of starvation! (can you hear the exaggeration and sarcasm?) Have my birthright, it means nothing to me.”  But Jacob wants to be sure, so he says “Make an unbreakable promise first.”  So Esau makes an unbreakable promise and Jacob gives him soup and some bread.

Esau completely spat on his birthright, which was an incredible privilege.

Then a famine comes and Isaac takes his family and they go to Abimelech (this is a different Abimelech to the one that Abraham had become friends with.  It is possible that every ruler of the Philistines would be called Abimelech.)  Abimelech lived in Gerar.

God appears to Isaac and says “Don’t go to Egypt, live exactly where I tell you to live.  Stay in this place for a while and I will be with you and bless you.  I will continue the unbreakable promise I gave to your father, Abraham, and make sure that your descendants are as many as the stars in the sky.  Oh and I’ll let everyone in the world be blessed because of one of your offspring.  This is all because Abraham kept my commands and my laws and my rules.”  SO because God said this Isaac stays in Gerar.

However he knows that Rebekah is beautiful and that the philistine might kill him in order to get Rebekah as on of their wives so he tells them that Rebekah is his sister… (sound familiar?)  However after a long time has passed the King, Abimelech, looks down from his window and sees Isaac “caressing” Rebekah and he realises that Isaac lied and that Rebekah is actually his wife. 

Abimelech summons Isaac to him and says “That women is really your wife! Why didn’t you tell me?”

Isaac says something like, “because I thought I might my killed so that some other man could have Rebekah.”  Abimelech says “Why?  Why do this to us?  One of us might have slept with your wife and that would have made us all guilty and could have brought a punishment upon us!”  Abimelech then gives orders “this man Isaac is to be left well alone.  If anyone threatens him or his wife then whoever does it will be put to death!”

Isaac plants crops in the land he has and reaps 100 times more than he planted (that’s a LOT.)  He became richer and richer until the Philistines actually envied him!  So in their envy they filled in the wells that had been dug when Abraham was alive they filled with earth so that they were useless.

Abimelech comes to Isaac after that and says “You have become too powerful.  You have to move away from us.

So Isaac does move away.  But the first place he stops the people who live there already say: “Nope, this is our land, you can’t stay here.”  And at the second place they stop at the people who live there already say the same thing.  But in the third place they stop at no one complains and so they settle down there and start living there and Isaac says “Now God has given us room to live in and we will flourish in this land.”

That night God appeared to Isaac and said “I am the same God that you father, Abraham, followed.  Do not ever be afraid because I am with you.  I will bless you and will make increase your descendents because of your father, Abraham.”  So Isaac built an alter there and he prayed to God.  He put his tent up there and his servants dug a well there. (A well was a source of water which was a source of life, a good source of water was extremely important)

While Isaac was doing this Abimelech comes from Gerar (where Isaac had lived) and Isaac meets him and says “Why have you come to me.  Didn’t you kick me out of my house in Gerar and make me go away from you?  SO why do you now come to me?”

Abimelech says “Look, Isaac, I can see that God is with you and so I think that we had better make an unbreakable promise together that we will live in peace together.  Did I not make sure that NO ONE in my kingdom hurt you or your wife?  Also we did not drive you out, but we let you leave in peace.  We don’t want to hurt you, but I want to formalise that and make it official.”

Isaac prepares a feast for them and they have a great time.  Then early the next morning they make an unbreakable promise with each other to be peaceful to each other and Abimelech goes away in peace.

That very day Isaac’s servants come to him and say “Master, we have found water!”  So Isaac called it Shibah (which means unbreakable promise) and the place around it is then known as Beersheba (the town of the unbreakable promise) because of the unbreakable promise that Isaac and Abimelech made there :D

One last thing: when Esau was forty years old he married two women.  They were both Hittites though and this caused Isaac and Rebekah to cry because Isaac had married foreigners.

Matthew 10:1-31

Jesus called his disciples together and then gave them the power to drive out demons from people and to heal every kind of sickness and disease.   The names of the twelve disciples were these: Simon Peter, Andrew, James (Zebedee’s Son), John, Philip, Bartholomew, Thomas, Matthew (a tax collector), James (Alphaeus’s Son), Thaddeus, Simon (who was a bit like a terrorist), and Judas Iscariot (who betrayed Jesus)

Jesus sent those twelve out to do miracles, but first he spoke to them and said:

“Only go and heal Jews.  Stay away from all the people who aren’t Jews.  What I want you to tell the Jews as you heal them is this: the kingdom of Heaven is VERY near.  Got that?  Right what I want you to do is this: heal those people who are sick, bring those who are dead back to life, those who have diseases which make them ungodly I want you to make godly, and the last thing you should do is drive out demons.  Please remember that I have given you all of this without any fee or charge.  SO because you have been given it for free make sure that you do not charge people when you do this, YOU must do this for free.”

Then he continued…

“Do not take money with you or any object that you can trade with like a bag, an extra tunic, a belt or a staff or you may be tempted to give it as payment, however wherever you stay you should not pay to stay there because you are working for the kingdom of heaven and that worth enough to pay for all your accommodation.  So when you enter a town or village I want you to look around and find somebody who is worthy and stay at his house until you leave.  Don’t stay at lots of different people’s houses, just choose one person who is godly and live with him.  Remember that when you go into the home you should bless the house with the power I’ve given you and ask that it is peaceful.  If you find that it is an ungodly house then you may take that blessing back.”

And he still went on…

“Here’s what to do if NO ONE in the town will listen to you: shake the dust that has got on your feet from the town off of your feet to show that you’re leaving it behind completely.  You know how Sodom and Gomorrah were destroyed back in the time of Abraham?  Well those evil people will get less punishment than any town that doesn’t welcome you.  But be careful, because you are like sheep and there are people who are like wolves about.  You have to be shrewd, like a snake is, and you have to be innocent, like a dove is.  Do not let your guard down because men will hand you over to the local councils and they will whip you in their churches.  Because of me you will be thrown before Kings and it will be your job at those times to tell them about me and be a witness.”

The disciples must have been looking pretty freaked out and scared at this point (with the talk of whipping and standing before Kings – they were mostly poor men with low statuses who would never dream of even seeing a king) because Jesus then says…

“But don’t be afraid because at these times the spirit of God, who is your father, will speak through you and it will not actually be you speaking.”

Then Jesus moved on to another topic…

“Brothers will betray one another so that one will die.  A father will betray his own child so that it will be killed.  Children are going to rebel against their parents and have them put to death.  ALL men will hate you because of me, but if you stand firm and keep believing in me then you WILL be saved.  If you are persecuted in a town then run away to another town and try telling them about me.  But I’m saying the truth when I say that before I come (and do my final rescue) you guys will not have got through all the cities of Israel.  There’s not that much time left before my move is made.

“But let me tell you this: A student is not above his teacher.  You know this and you know that a servant is not above his master.  They can only try and be LIKE their teacher or master.  If a father has been called Satan then his family must be even more like Satan.  But don’t be afraid of them.  There is NOTHING that is hidden or concealed hat will not be made known.  I tell you things in the dark at the moment, but there will come a time and you’ll speak it out in the daylight.  I whisper things in your ears, but in time it will be your task to shout those whispers from the rooftops.”

And Jesus then went on…

“So don’t be afraid of those guys who can kill your body, but they can’t hurt your soul.  But DO be afraid of the One who can destroy your body AND your soul.  Sparrows are the cheapest things you can buy, but they won’t die unless God wills it.  God even knows how many hairs are on your head.  So don’t be afraid because he looks after the sparrows which are cheap and you’re worth more to him than millions of sparrows.”

Proverbs 1:20-33

True wisdom is like a woman who stands in the street and calls out loudly in the middle of Redhill

In the Belfry on a Saturday she cries out

At the doors to busy shops she makes her speech:

“How long will you “simple” people continue with your “simple” ways?

You who mock others, how long will you do that?

How long will you idiots hate knowledge?

“If you had made a response to when I told you that you were going wrong!  Wisdom would have shown you that you were doing wrong!

I would have told you many things.  Wisdom could have told you lots of things.

I would have told you my own thoughts! You would have had the thoughts of wisdom!

But you rejected me (Wisdom) when I called out to you

And though I reached out my hand to help you, because Wisdom could help you, you ignored it!

You ignored all of my advice, (though it was Wisdom)

And you would not let me tell you when I was going wrong.

So when you come to disaster I will laugh

When bad things happen to you I will mock you

When terrible things happen

When you are scared and you feel like life is crushing you

Those people will call to me but I will not answer

They will look for me (wisdom) but they will not find me.

They hated knowledge

And they chose not to be respectful of God

They would not accept my wise advice

And they spurned me when I tried to tell them they were being stupid

It’s like they are planting seeds of bad things when they are being stupid

They will eat the fruit of badness

The silliness of the unwise will kill them

Their complacency will destroy them

BUT if you listen to me you will live in safety

You will not have to fear harm.